We Need a New Cuss Word! (by Montana Grant)
By angelamontana

Posted: September 22, 2015

cussHunters, fishermen, hikers, outdoorsmen, and yes, even tree huggers CUSS! Whether they cuss because of missing a shot, losing a fish, or are just angry, we all cuss!

Cursing is a basic human need. Stress and anxiety are released after we voice our anger. Simply put, we feel better and are able to move onto the next life challenge. The problem is that after we cuss and relieve our stress, it is often at someone else’s expense.

Our current dictionary of cuss words is thick and offensive. These foul words address sex, gender, heritage, intelligence, anatomy, ethnicity, religion, and anything else that comes up. Many are adjectives and some are nouns, but all are rude and offensive.

We do, however, need a cuss word or two to help us survive life’s challenges. Coming up with a couple new and acceptable curse words should be a simple task for us creative humans. Our current repertoire is quite creative and impressive. Most of the impact and stress relief comes from the energy and delivery anyway.

I thought about how we would do this, and tried to take 2 letters from each commonly used curse word and create a new word. Wouldn’t it be great to come up with a curse word that you could use after hitting your hand with a hammer in front of your kids? You would be able to avoid the “wide eyed, open-mouthed” reaction that’s priceless, but unable to take back. Next thing you know, your wife is on your case after the kids told on you!

“F-it”! What if we look at disasters and the changing weather that affects us all for inspiration? “F” could mean “flood it” The “H” word could be about “Hail” Wind certainly “blows”. “Hailstones” gives us the 2 syllable phrase so often found in curse words. The best curse words are phrases that flow smoothly out of our angry, silver tongues.

Maybe other outdoor experiences would work here. We could “Shoot the Rapids”, “Buck it”, “Frack It”, or “Dam the River”! Geography can give us some creative ideas. “Great Rockies”, “Appalachian Mountains”, “Geyser hot springs”, or you can go “Across the wide Missouri”! These allow the curser to say a phrase that will thoroughly relieve their stress.

Maybe historical events would help. “Custer’s Last Stand”, or “go to the moon”, or maybe “…………….

The key to cursing is how we present each word or phrase. It is about how much energy we use to release our inner fury. Body language, gestures, volume, and tone are what really elevate the words or phrases to an offensive level.

“So here you go hailstone, just jump across the wide Missouri and go to the Geyser hot springs while you frack yourself! Great Rockies what do you want me say, just flood it and go buck yourself in the wind!”

That felt so good and I didn’t offend anyone, I think. Oh well, if I said something you didn’t like, then “go climb the Appalachian Mountains and Dam the river”!

Just get it off your chest gently!

Montana Grant

See more Montana Grant stories at www.montanagrantfishing.com

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